Love / Sex / Dating

Issue 09 | The Theoretical Leader

Rational Architect INTP - Marie Curie


They make up about 10% of the population. And you won’t find them where you find most people. Since they are scarce to begin with, and hard to find in common places, the majority won’t ever get to date them. Rationals are out to change the world. From a distance, it would seem kind of cool to date a world-changer. After all, they envision, strategize, create, and explore—coming up with visions, plans, inventions, and theories, which make a dent on the planet. But, what’s it really like to be in a relationship with one of them? Well, be forewarned; it will change your life. It’s inevitable. You date a world-changer, and your world will change too. Maybe for better, or maybe for worse. Some will feel like it was the best decision of their lives, while others face deep regret.


When Artisans are in a relationship with a Rational they are challenged to do something big with their lives. Rationals see Artisans as having extraordinary competence, but they also recognize that Artisans can get easily side tracked, thereby, wasting away their talents. Rationals will encourage Artisans to set goals (both short-term and long-term ones). They will push them to think bigger than the immediate payoffs. They will fuel the Artisan’s audacity to make an impact that is long lasting, rather than just a momentary splash. They will create an appetite for the Artisan to hunger for success, and will get them to pay the price. They won’t allow their Artisan partner to be lazy or to fall into derailing pleasures and addictions. If the Artisan jumps onto the Rational’s ride, they can end up doing considerable damage, accomplishing much, and making a huge dent with their lives.


When Guardians are in a relationship with a Rational, all of their assumptions, beliefs, and rules they adhere to are questioned. Rationals see Guardians as highly compliant, and this can be a good thing, as long as rules are not followed blindly. Rationals will encourage Guardians to formulate their own opinions, and get them to live their own lives, and not live the way society says they must. They will push them to question and challenge rather than accept things the way they are. They will fuel the Guardian’s desire for respect, by stating that self-respect is far greater than whether others respect you. They will create an appetite for the Guardian to hunger for independence, and will get them to think. They won’t allow their Guardian partner to just be busy without a purpose, or to follow what the book says without discerning on their own. If the Guardian steps into the Rational’s vehicle, they will be forced to make some U-turns, take shortcuts, and be okay with ambiguity.


When Idealists are in a relationship with a Rational, their search for their identity will be questioned. Rationals see Idealists as dreamers, but they recognize that dreams remain as mere good feelings until they are pursued. Rationals will encourage Idealists to create destiny rather than wait for it to unfold. They will push them to be tougher and to develop a thicker skin, so that they can roll up their sleeves to work for their dream in reality. They will fuel the Idealist’s need to be authentic, by stating that authenticity is only evidenced when dreams manifest in the world, and not when they are hidden in one’s own heart. They will create an appetite for strategizing fulfillment. They won’t allow their Idealist partner to settle for living with possibilities. Rationals will insist that they actualize their potential. If the Idealist journeys with the Rational, they will be awakened daily to live and to work, and not allowed to rest in the contentment of their delightful delusions.


When Rationals are in a relationship with each other, they can be a powerful couple, pushing and competing with each other to drive harder, and to persist longer. Rationals see other Rationals as being formidable individuals, but they recognize that they can become obsessive with their pursuits. On the one hand, Rationals will encourage their fellow Rational to set boundaries, but will have a blind spot to their own need for this. On the other hand, they will push each other to the point of exhaustion to achieve an objective. They will go through hell together to get to their goal, believing that they can deal with the aftermath later. They will fuel each other’s willpower to keep going no matter what, by keeping the vision front and center. They will engage the appetite for dominating their domain, and will invest whatever they can to go the distance. They won’t allow their Rational partner to ever give up. Two Rationals together can be a driving, penetrating force.

Loving Unconditionally

Loving unconditionally is about total acceptance of the other. It means accepting the good, the bad, the lovely, and the ugly. And let’s face it, that’s hard to do!

Becoming the One

It is far more important to focus on becoming the person you want to be, rather than finding the one you want to be with. The more important list is not about the qualities you’re looking for, but it’s the list of qualities you are seeking to develop. In other words, we’d suggest that you focus more on becoming the one, rather than finding the one.